


Alternative ending to Detentions with/out Dumbledore

by BunaLover



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Darkness, Draco Malfoy Needs a Hug, Draco Malfoy death, Draco Malfoy suicide, Draco isn't a death eater, Good Draco Malfoy, Hurt Draco Malfoy, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, M/M, Queerplatonic Relationships, Self-Harm, Self-Hatred, Suicide, queerplatonic Harry Potter & Ron Weasley
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 15:35:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,287
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26251258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BunaLover/pseuds/BunaLover
Summary: Alternative ending to the YouTube series Detentions with/out Dumbledore by The Mischief Managers.After Harry and Draco breaks up Harry can’t let go, but one night he finds out a terrible truth…TW self-harm and suicide
Relationships: Hermione Granger & Harry Potter & Ron Weasley
Comments: 5
Kudos: 40





	Alternative ending to Detentions with/out Dumbledore

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Detentions with/out Dumbledore](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/677977) by The Mischeif Managers. 



> Well hello there, who ever you might be? The options are endless, maybe you’re a human being, maybe not? Anyway, I’m happy that you are here and wants to read this story written by me. Before you start to read there are some things you should know.  
> 1\. IMPORTANT!!! This story has trigger warnings that are suicide and self-harm. Please DO NOT read this story if you are triggered by this, and if you have problem please try to speak to someone. Here follows some suicide hotlines:  
> Sweden: (46) 31 711 2400  
> USA: 1-800-273-8255  
> UK: 116 123  
> Link to where you’ll find more numbers: https://faq.whatsapp.com/general/security-and-privacy/global-suicide-hotline-resources/?lang=en  
> PLEASE talk with someone if you’re feeling suicidal! And remember, it will get better!  
> 2\. This story is an alternative ending to the YouTube series Detentions with/out Dumbledore made by The Mischief Managers (https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLnrcXMm5sJV5gbZQeV9YNU0ibIA2Njlj4). Their series are used as a backstory and I recommend you watch it before reading this, but it’s not necessary to understand what’s happening. The first scene is from their video “You were my love” and the lines are directly copied down except for two of them.  
> I strongly recommend all of you to watch the series but also the other videos on their channel – all of their videos are EXTREAMLY good!  
> 3\. I do not own Harry Potter, instead there is a terf called J.K. Rowling who owns it and all the rights goes to her bla bla bla. I do not support JKR or her views but since I like the HP universe I won’t leave. Instead I will never again let any of my money go to her and I will continue to ask all of you to stop giving her your money. Buy secondhand and fanmade stuff instead!

●◉◎◈◎◉●

Draco was sitting alone at the bed in the dorm he shared with Blaise. He took up his robes and looked towards the end of his bed, rolling his eyes.

“I know you’re here”, he said, putting his chin forward. “Stalker.”

“Who are you calling stalker, stalker?” Harry answered as he took off his cloak, his body that sat down at the bed getting visible. Draco smiled at him as he put the cloak away.

“That doesn’t even make sense”, Draco scoffed, his smile disappearing and his voice sounding a bit unnerved as he continued:

“You can’t stay long. I have something that I need to keep working on.” His voice quieted down at the end.

“What is this, your secret project again?” Harry asked, raising his eyebrow.

“Why do you always jump to the conclusion that I’m keeping secrets from you?” Draco asked, talking fast. “Maybe I’m going to the prefects’ meeting!”

“There’s no prefects’ meeting!” Harry cut back. “I’d have heard about it from Ron and Hermione.”

“But then, maybe…”, Draco started, his voice searching for an excuse; “quidditch meeting?”

“Fine”, Harry said with a sigh, crossing his arms. “I’ll be quick about it.”

Draco sighed, turning his turning his robes over in his hands. He looked up at Harry with a questioning look. “So?” he asked. “What do you want to talk about?”  
Silence.

Harry put his hands down, turning them around as he tried to find his words.

“Draco, I-“, he started, pausing again. “-can’t be involved with you anymore…” He paused again. “We can’t keep seeing each other. We can’t-“, He talked a lot faster now. “We can’t be together.”

“It’s for some stupid noble reason, isn’t it?” Draco scoffed. Harry rose his eyebrows and sighed.

“It’s been like something out of somebody else’s life, these past few months with you. But- I can’t-“, he said, his arms crossed. “I’ve got something I need to do, alone now…” he said, his voice disappearing at the end.

“Really?” Draco asked hardly, his eyes on Harry. “Then, what are you gonna do?”

There was a silence again, as Harry searched for the right words.

“Well, I’m not- I’m not coming back next semester”, he stated. Draco shook his head, confused.

“What-? Then where are you going if you’re not coming back to school?” Draco’s voice was clearly wondering what this all could be about.

Harry looked down at his hands. “I can’t, I’m sorry”, he said.

“What-?” Draco asked before regaining his spirit. “Well… Who says I’m coming back next semester anyway” he finished, now in a much harder tone.

“Why not?” Harry asked, looking confused.

Draco looked him dead in the eyes and answered in a cold tone. “I’m sorry, I can’t.”

“Does it have anything to do with Voldemort?” Harry asked and Draco looked at him darkly, not answering. “I’m not as stupid as you seem to think I am. During all the time that we’ve been together, you’ve kept your sleeves firmly pulled down. Who sleeps with their school shirt on Draco?!” Harry continued, his voice a bit angry.

“I’ve told you, I have a scar from that Hippogriff-“ Draco said, holding his hand over his left arm, but Harry interrupted him.

“Okay, okay, let’s make this easy. Show me your arm,” Harry said, looking intensely at Draco.

“What are you on about?” Draco asked.

“Or don’t show me your arm. That’s up to you”, Harry started. “But in that case, I am going to draw my own conclusions.”

“Harry please”, Draco pleaded, but Harry started collecting his cloak, getting ready to leave. “It’s not like you think it is!” he said, his voice desperate.

“Then prove it to me! I can help you, I’ve already offered to!” Harry said loudly, but Draco just shook his head.

“You can’t help me. No one can…” he said, making it sound like it was a global known fact.

“That’s your choice,” Harry stated. “Don’t you-“

“Leave.” Draco’s voice was hard as he interrupted Harry.

“I just- I just wished I’d asked you sooner… We could’ve had ages… months, or even- even years-“ Harry pleaded, reaching out with his hand toward Draco’s, but Draco moved it away.

“Leave. Now.”

Harry stood up, leaving Draco in the room.

●◉◎◈◎◉●

Harry sat at his bed, it was a late Monday night and his dormmates was already asleep. It had been almost one month since he and Draco – no, Malfoy – broke up, but he didn’t feel ready to let go. He wished he could, wished that he’d be able to focus on his lessons instead of thinking about that soft blond hair. Wished his eyes didn’t always search over to the Slytherin table whenever they were eating. Wished he could focus in potions instead of looking over to where Draco sat, his hands steady as he dropped ingredients down into his potion.

But it had become a fact that no, he couldn’t not do that. He couldn’t not notice how sad Draco’s eyes always looked. He couldn’t not notice how Draco wouldn’t talk to his friends during dinner, the times he even showed up. He couldn’t not focus on how much he still loved the boy.

Still, he knew it was hopeless. The semester was coming to an end and next year he wouldn’t come back – he had an important mission that he needed to do. And it wasn’t as that was the only problem – there was the fact that he knew what mark was imprinted on Draco’s left forearm. And most importantly; he knew what it meant. And he knew that meant they couldn’t be together. Not during those times, probably never. A war was raising on them and they wasn’t fighting for the same cause.

But even as he knew all the facts, he couldn’t help but miss all the time they’d have together. That time Dumbledore made them eat noodles and how Draco had refused to even try and beat Ron and Hermione. Or that time they’d played truth and dare, and how they’d had to share a butterfly kiss. Or well, at least an awkward try on one. How Draco had suggested they should go on a date, after that time they’d have to write about why family is important. How Draco later had called it off, but then how amazing their date had been. That first real kiss they’d shared…

Harry shook his head to stop thinking about it, it just hurt to think about all they’d had and never would have again. He considered going to sleep, but decided against it – Draco still hadn’t went back and he wanted to know when he would head back to the dungeons. He tried telling himself that the only reason he would look at his name on the map was because maybe it could give him some clue that could be helpful in the war, but he knew it wasn’t true. He just wanted to know what the blond was doing.

Even if he knew his friends was worried about him he continued staying up late, Ron had sighed and said that after all it wasn’t really a big difference from the stalking he’d done earlier – Harry had throwed an apple at him.

Something changed at the map and Harry’s eyes was drawn to it, only to let out a gasp. The nametag with the name “Draco Malfoy” in cursive had totally disappeared from the map, not moved, but vanished.

When his mind had managed to work out what it meant he shot up, leaving the map in his bed and started running. As soon as he had got out from the Gryffindor common room and out to the corridors, he directed his way to the second floor and Moaning Myrtle’s bathroom, where he had seen the name the latest.

His mind raced, trying to come up with some explanation that would mean it was just some death eater business, but he was painfully aware that that wasn’t a likely scenario. He knew you couldn’t apparate out of Hogwarts, it was simply impossible.

It felt like it had been forever when he finally paused in front of the door, just so he could open it. His heart stopped when he looked into the bathroom, seeing a red liquid from the stall the farthest inside. He throwed himself forwards, managing to move himself to it. The door was locked but he broke it open, not even for one second thinking about the fact that an Alohomora could have fixed the job faster.

He dropped to his knees when he came inside, crawling on his knees to his Draco who laid there, in a puddle of blood. He cradled his Draco into his arms, his fingers grabbing the pale wrist, the contrast big between the dark fingers and the white hand. He tried searching for a pulse, even as he knew there was no chance. No hope.

His hand went from the wrist up over Draco’s arm, which he now realised was uncovered – Draco’s shirt wasn’t on his chest. Draco’s skin wasn’t as smooth as Harry would have imagined, instead it was full of small scars. His eyes went down to the arms, and he became painfully aware that there was no black snake marking the left forearm. Instead there were just scars, everywhere, more than he could count.

His cheeks were wet with tears as he buried his face in the soft, blond hair. His body shook with sobs.

“Dray..” he whispered, cradling the all-to-thin body closer. “Come back to me, please.”

As arms grabbed him from behind he barley noticed it, just continued holding his Draco, never letting go. A soothing voice talked next to his ear and he let himself lean into the comfort even as he held on to his Draco.

●◉◎◈◎◉●

It was dark around him, but he could hear the hushed voices of his classmates as they got ready for breakfast and the day. When he listened, he could make out words here and there, his name was mentioned more than once. He appreciated that they cared, he did. But at the moment he couldn’t bring himself to even try and please them, it hurt too much.  
He remembered all the events from that night as in a haze – how the name had disappeared, how he had found Draco. How Ron had arrived just after together with McGonagall and Dean. After that everything was in even more off a blur, but sometime later he had been back in his bed, the blood washed away. Ron had held him, giving what comfort he could.

Even as he tried not to think about it, he remembered how Draco’s body had looked. How the usual pale skin had been even whiter. He remembered the non-presence of the mark and he knew he had only himself to blame for jumping to conclusions so quickly. He wondered if he’d be able to save Draco if he hadn’t assumed so much. If only he had tried finding out the truth, he could have stopped this.

“It’s not like you think it is!”

If he hadn’t been so freaking oblivious and just listened to Draco. He could’ve got Draco to stop with the cutting, to show him that there were other solutions. He could’ve got Draco to survive.

Hermione had told him that Draco probably hadn’t meant to leave them – Pansy had explained that there was no suicide note to be found and no sign he had meant to end his life, so it had probably been an accident. Harry didn’t even know what would’ve been worse – that Draco had felt so badly that he didn’t even want to live anymore, or that he had lost his life when he didn’t want to.

Harry was dragged from his thoughts as he heard the door open. He could hear Hermione’s hushed voice and Ron’s answering. Quiet steps moved closer and soon the curtains was parted and Hermione sat down at his bed. Harry barley looked up at her, not wanting to see the pity on her face.

“Harry”, she started, whispering. “Please, talk to us, we want to help you”, she said, but Harry shook his head in response – he didn’t feel like talking. McGonagall har allowed him to stay in bed for the rest of the weekend, but after that she wanted him to start talking to a mind healer.

He knew he was needed, that he had an important mission and that it had to come first. But at the same time, he couldn’t even imagine going back to the world, when he knew Draco never would be back.

“Pansy gave me this, she wanted you to have it”, Hermione said and held up something. “I put a preservation charm on it.”

Harry looked up and recognised what she was holding, Draco’s jumper – the one he’d got from Molly at Christmas. He took it and buried his face in it, it still smelled like Draco.

“Me and Ron will be back later, rest now”, she said softly and patted Harry’s arm carefully, before rising up and starting to leave.

“Thank you”, Harry mumbled into the jumper, and he heard Hermione turning a little towards him before leaving.

Not long after he heard the door again and then it was quiet, everyone else had left for breakfast. He knew Ron and Hermione would come back later, giving him some food and just being there for him, but for now he was alone. He allowed his tears to start again, crying into Draco’s jumper.

After a time of just laying there, crying, his breaths evened out and he fell asleep, dreaming of all the moments he’d shared with his Draco.

●◉◎◈◎◉●

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked this! I’ve really enjoyed writing it so I hope you like it as well. Please leave kudos and comments and say what you thought! Also, would anyone like a sequel? I’m thinking about writing one but not sure though, so say what you think!  
> If you haven’t done so already, check in The Mischief Manager’s channel!  
> Remember to eat healthy and stay hydrated! Take care of yourself and the people around you!  
> This is not BETAd, if you’d like to, just contact me!


End file.
